What Paris Holloway Taught Me About Loving Without Losing Yourself — Cherry Sha'Ron

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Paris Holloway is a fictional character. But the thing she carried is not fictional at all.

Most of the women I know have loved somebody the way Paris loved Marcus. With full information. With open eyes. Knowing what they were getting into and choosing to walk in anyway because something in them believed the love was worth it. That the person was worth it. That God had a plan in it somewhere.

And most of those women lost themselves a little in the process.

Not because they were stupid. Not because they were weak. But because loving hard without boundaries is a slow leak. You do not notice how much of yourself you have given away until one day you reach for something that used to be yours and it is not there anymore.

Paris taught me three things I want to leave with you today.

1. Staying is not the same as surrendering. Paris stayed. But she never stopped building. She never stopped praying. She never stopped being Paris. Staying in a hard situation does not have to mean losing yourself in it. You can love somebody and still protect what God put inside you.

2. Your discernment was right the first time. Paris knew something was off about Kezia from the very first conversation. She filed it away and kept moving. We do that. We feel the nudge and talk ourselves out of it. Your first read on a person is usually your most accurate one. The Holy Spirit does not repeat himself — he whispers.

3. What he meant for harm God already converted. This is the part of Paris's story that wrecked me when I wrote it. She did not know she was building an empire. She just kept showing up. She kept working. She kept trusting God with the pieces she could not control. And when it was all said and done everything he thought he was using against her had become the foundation of everything she was building for herself.

That is not a coincidence. That is God.

If you are in a Paris season right now — stay close to God, keep building, and do not apologize for how hard you love. Just make sure you are loving yourself with that same energy.

The Kingdom Prison Wife is available now through Cherry Sha'Ron's Book Club at cherrysharon.com/book-club 🍒